An old Cowboy decides to go on vacation to Las Vegas after working his ass off for a few years without much of a break.
He’s having a grand old time gambling at one of the large casinos and hits a small jackpot. He thinks to himself that since he’s in Vegas and has a little extra cash, he’d like to find himself a hooker since he hasn’t had any sex in a good while.
He goes walking down the Strip and after a short while sees a smoking hot prostitute. He meanders up to her and says, “ Hello Miss. I see you’re a lady of the night. May I inquire as to how much you might charge for a hand job?”
The hooker responds quickly “Fifty bucks”.
“Holy smokes, that’s a whole lotta money for a simple hand job!! I can probably get 5 hand jobs from Bertha the cook back at the Ranch!”, says the old Cowboy.
The hooker looks him straight in the eye and says “ Well, you ain’t at the Ranch. Besides see all these diamond rings? (all 10 fingers have diamond rings) Well I got those from giving hand jobs.”
The old Cowboy shrugs his shoulders and thinks ‘oh what the heck’ and gives the hooker the fifty bucks. They go into the alley and do the deed. It’s the best hand job the old Cowboy has ever had in his entire life. He sees stars it’s so good.
They part ways and the old Cowboy goes back to gambling. A couple of hours later, he hits a fairly large jackpot. He’s still a little bit horny, so he goes back out to the strip to find the hooker. After a short while he finds her and says, “Excuse me, that was one hell of a hand job. How much for a blow job?”
“$500”, says the hooker.
“Holy shit”, says the old Cowboy, “That’s just plum crazy!”
The hooker points to a nearby large black Mercedes Benz and shows him the key fob and chirps the alarm and says, “You see that gorgeous car? It’s mine and I got that from giving blow jobs”.
The old Cowboy shrugs his shoulders and hands the hooker five $100 bills and they go to the alley and do the deed. It’s the best blow job the old Cowboy has every had. It’s so good he almost passes out. He thanks the hooker profusely and leaves to return to his gambling.
A couple of hours later, the old Cowboy hits a huge jackpot. Now he’s really horny and intrigued. He thinks to himself “I gotta get laid!”.
The old Cowboy walks up and down the strip for about an hour and finally spots the hooker. He runs up to her and says “Hey there…how much for some pussy?!”
The hooker points across the street and says “Do you see that casino over there?”
“Yeah”, says the old Cowboy.
The hooker says “Well, if I had a pussy, I’d own that casino!!”
Another funny joke posted by BoreddHuman, originally seen on Reddit.